Not all relationships are naturally healthy. Throughout the e-books and videos we’ve been talking about how Love Addiction is in part caused by the behaviour of the pursuer, the person with the neediness, desires, fantasy. But sometimes we may find ourselves in a situation where, not only are we predisposed towards Love Addiction, fear of abandonment and panic, but we have a partner who makes things worse because of their own narcissistic nature. It is not about apportioning blame, as we are only able to change ourselves. But at least if we can recognise the signs of a narcissistic relationship then we can do something about it. If your partner has an abusive nature then there is little you can do and it may bring you solace to realise it was never really your fault.
“We become attached to what’s familiar, and sometimes we hold onto things that are safe and predictable, even if they are bad for us.” John Bowlby