“If there is any possible consolation in the tragedy of losing someone we love very much, it is the necessary hope that perhaps it was for the best.” Paulo Coelho
- Differentiating fantasy from reality.
- Working through deficient self-worth.
- Discovering a way through rejection, insecurity, and abandonment.
- Self value, self care, and the search for meaning and purpose.
- How to overcome and survive love withdrawal and a painful separation.
- Redirecting the craving for love to a significant new connection to yourself.
- Self empowerment, self validation and knowing when love hurts to let go.
- Building inner resources to avoid projecting onto others what you feel you lack in yourself.
- Reversing self abandonment (putting the beloved before yourself).
- Learning the difference between healthy love and insecure, anxious love.
Now, and any time in the future you can reflect on this list and choosing the one that seems to stand out, you can find practical ways to put it into action. Remember it’s small steps that get you there. If for example you’ve chosen number 9, reversing self abandonment, then the next time there’s a decision about what to do, instead of thinking “what would they like to do”, allow yourself to think “what do I want to do”. When dressing, instead of “Would they like this outfit” think “I want to wear the clothes that make me feel good today”.