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Could jealousy, fear of abandonment, anxious attachment and possessive love caused the downfall of Oscar Pistorious?

Expert Relationship and Marital Therapist, Helen Mia Harris looks at how jealousy in relationships can be one of the most destructive of emotions as it is driven by fear, loss, insecurity and the terror of abandonment. She explains how the jealous person loves and how they can make their partner a prisoner because of the fear that the partner is stronger and is able to live without them.

Helen explores how a combination of circumstances in Oscar Pistorious’ formative years could begin to explain why Oscar and Reeva’s relationship came to such a tragic end.

Read more about Narcissistic Attachment in Relationships or read about Surviving Narcissistic Neglect

After several weeks’ of therapy, I cannot believe I was even in the space I was a few months ago, Helen’s empathy and counsel have given me the tools to find my way again in all aspects of life, I feel confident, relaxed and content, my wife and I are looking forward to the next stage of our life journey together. I cannot recommend her enough, an amazing lady who simply helps you bring light back in to your own life. Thank you Helen

Blackheath

Working with Helen is inspiring. She walks the line between empathy and impartiality perfectly, encouraging you to give your best effort in a supportive and positive environment. She is intuitive, caring and professional. I leave my sessions feeling uplifted.

Tunbridge Wells

I wouldn’t have got through those awful times without you.. And that really is the truth! Never underestimate that what you can do for people is really quite wonderful.

Chislehurst

Helen helped me through I time in my life where I truly believed there was no way out and no way forward. She showed me how to find again my self confidence and my self respect, and most importantly how to find peace. To Helen, I owe my happiness and I am eternally grateful

Kent

In only three sessions with Helen, I felt like I gained a clearer more positive perspective to why I felt so insecure in my relationship -she encouraged me to take a step back from what I’d been doing and focus on what I could do differently to move forward. I am so much more confident now and my partner and I feel far more open and connected to one another, a very real and honest experience.

Kent

Helen really does transform people’s lives….in a few sessions something has changed in me, her warmth and exceptionally responsive engagement is unique and like no other.A highly recommendable experience.

Tunbridge Wells

Helen is a star – my saviour and my rock – and to her I owe my mental peace and happiness. And that is no exaggeration.

Seal

Helen is a very effective psychotherapist whose warmth, knowledge and sensitivity combine to enable her to analyse the most difficult of problems. Her professional integrity is second to none, making her ideally placed to provide advice and structure for her clients, without judgement. This approach enabled me to tackle my own challenges with honesty. I would recommend her without hesitation.

Kent

After receiving shocking news about my health and then undergoing extensive life threatening surgery, I thought I had coped well. However, it wasn’t until the full extent of my experiences had sunk in that I began to be plagued by nightmares and dreaded going to sleep. Helen helped me deal with the traumas I’d faced; her support was invaluable.

Aylesford

Helen helped me – and my immediate family too – through a traumatic time in my life where I could see no way forward. Her unfailing interest in me and my situation, over a period of months, coupled with her almost magical ability to make me understand things more clearly, really did pull me through. Helen was a rock for both me and my family and we are eternally grateful to her.

Sevenoaks

Helen seems to have such a profound understanding of what loss feels like, it’s as if she knows where you are, she has helped me regain some sense of purpose after the loss of my partner 18 months ago, in appreciation as I feel much lighter now

Chislehurst

Helen helped my husband and I to begin to communicate some of the underlying disappointments that we have harboured for many years, too her we give thanks to feeling much closer to one another

Westerham

I want to express my appreciation for the insight that you provided me with a few weeks back, you helped me understand the difference between love and jealousy, and I can begin to understand how I kept repeating the same patterns in my relationships, thank you, something has definitely changed.

Sevenoaks

I am very grateful for the counselling sessions that you have shared with my wife and I, we have never done anything like this before but I would certainly recommend it to anyone, now if there is an atmosphere between us, we have found a way to “handle” our conflict, this is very new to us both but it seems to work.

Tunbridge Wells