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Secure Attachment Focused Couples Counselling, Relationship & Marriage Counselling

Based in Sevenoaks, Kent, relationship expert Helen Mia Harris helps married and non-married couples overcome relationship challenges and learn how to reconnect and revitalise a tired or struggling relationship. Helen successfully applies her proven unique approach to couples counselling, individuals relationship counselling, marriage coaching, and couples therapy. Building stronger relationships with secure attachment couples therapy.

Couples Therapist in SevenoaksHelen’s warmth, insight and attentiveness will help you through this challenging time to either discover a more secure emotional attachment bond or find clarity as to why certain problems keep reoccurring, enabling you to find a way forward and make a safe, effective decision for you and your relationship. Relationship issues don’t just affect the individual or couple involved, they also affect the entire family, both immediate and distant, and your family’s future.

Helen helps partners to communicate more effectively and learn how to listen more closely, working with integrity and respect for all parties at her Sevenoaks practice.

Is Your Relationship in Crisis? How to tell if you need Couples Therapy?

  • 2heartsbDoes your marriage lack the intimacy, closeness and passion that it once had?
  • Do you feel unappreciated and taken for granted by your spouse?
  • Do you feel as though you see things from two completely different viewpoints, and are constantly arguing as a result?
  • Do you feel invisible to your spouse, ignored and unheard?
  • Do you feel unable to communicate your feelings properly, because whenever you do, it always results in another row, or emotional withdrawal?
  • Does your relationship lack an emotional connection?
  • Do you feel unloved, insecure and no longer appreciated?
  • Do you have mounting resentments and feel constantly disappointed with your partner?
  • Do you feel as though you’re “living alone together”, no longer connected like you once were?
  • Do you feel that you have lost a sense of who you are in the relationship?
  • Has your relationship lost the passion and attraction it once had?
  • Have you lost respect for your spouse, or do you worry that they’ve lost respect for you?

If you answered “YES” to any of these questions, then it’s crucial that you take action quickly and discover the reasons for the breakdown in your marriage/relationship, and the tools you need to rebuild it.

The fact is, couples are often unaware of why this distance has grown between them until it’s too late. They’re unsure how to meet their partner’s needs, which can result in a lack of communication, empathy, mutual respect and appreciation.

And sadly sometimes, divorce.

Is Divorce the Only Way Out?

Separation and divorce should be the absolute last resort, because it can be one of the most distressing experiences that anyone can ever go through, not to mention the self-blame, personal failure, responsibility and guilt that can result from it, particularly if it’s not a mutual decision.

Yet while many couples may feel as though divorce is the only option, they fail to adequately explore the reasons why the marriage has failed in the first place.

And that’s the key point.

Isn’t it worth doing everything you can to understand the REASONS that lie behind your failing marriage, so you can repair it, find a solution to the problems you share, and finally start enjoying a happy, mutually loving and respectful marriage? Furthermore, these relationship issues may be a pattern in your life that will keep re-appearing if it’s not recognised, understood and finally overcome.

Bespoke Marriage Counselling & Relationship Therapy Sessions

Helen’s bespoke marriage counselling and relationship therapy sessions will help you discover what is possible, providing you with the practical strategies to move forward and understand the underlying issues that are hindering communication, connection and closeness.

Once you understand each other’s wants and needs properly, both of you will feel validated and acknowledged, and it’s this that will enable you to rebuild the secure attachment bond that is the foundation of any successful and loving relationship.

And in as little as three to four 90-minute sessions, I can assure you that you will notice a real, tangible difference in your marriage.

“We were on the verge of breaking up after a 12 year marriage. Helen gave us the tools to understand each other. We now know that we were emotionally disconnected and didn’t listen or respect one another. Now we are much closer and happier; even the passion and intimacy has returned! We are eternally grateful for your help.” — Carol and Andrew, London

“A truly uplifting and insightful experience! Helen gets right to the heart of things in her marriage breakthrough sessions.” — Elizabeth, London

“Helen offers insightful strategies that gave us the solution to move forward in our marriage and rebuild a secure emotional connection, even though our relationship was fraught with problems” — Adrian, Kent

How Helen Mia Harris’ Secure Attachment Relationship and Couples Counselling  Will Help You

With more than 25 years’ experience as a marriage coach, relationship counsellor, and couples therapist, Helen Mia Harris’ expertise lies in helping couples to re-examine the way they “handle” their problems, rather than focusing on the problems themselves.

Typically, both parties will believe that they are right, and the other is wrong, which subsequently leads to continued and repetitive arguments, followed by a lack of communication, distancing, and finally, a breakdown of the marriage.

During these sessions, marriage coach and expert relationship counsellor Helen Mia Harris encourages both parties to speak openly, and most importantly, to hear each other’s voice and version of events, possibly for the first time. As a result, you will be finally be able to see the true nature of the relationship, the “dynamics” at work, and what might be hindering closeness and intimacy.

By allowing both parties to be heard and understood, Helen opens the door to real and honest communication, enabling couples to finally end the vicious cycle of anger, bitterness, silence, conflict, indifference and resentment that plagues so many marriages, and instead build a path towards healthy communication, deeper connection, empathy, respect, trust, and a mutually loving, happy relationship.

To make an appointment for your Couples Counselling Session, call Helen on 01732 617344 or email


Individual counselling and therapy and mentoring begins with words, so the therapist gets to know your individual history and the particular suffering at stake. By naming what you struggle with, this creates a quietening down of anxiety and incessant worrying about something that overwhelms you.

By talking about this, emotions and feelings become diffused, and here the work begins which enables deeper perspective, clarity and direction and the words to find yourself in a story that you begin to call your own.

Specialist Couples Relationship Counsellor and Psychotherapist, Helen Mia Harris adopts an integrative approach to counselling, psychotherapy and mentoring. She works with your own unique circumstances and this integration offers tremendous flexibility and creativity towards making positive life changes.

Together you explore your needs in the face of life challenges and the issues underlying your difficulties. From this, Helen can create a tailor made programme for you to move forward and experience a profound new approach to love, relationships and daily life, both personally and in the workplace by gaining capacity for empathy and for working effectively with others.

Counselling For Individuals

  • Individual Counselling and Therapies ( 75 minutes)
  • Individual Relationship Recovery Programmes (90 minutes)
  • NLP Life Coaching and Mentoring (90 minutes)
  • Intensive Marriage – Relationship Recovery Programme for Individuals and Couples (2 hours)

These sessions are most helpful for those who may be experiencing difficulties in relationships, i.e. heartbreak, abandonment, insecurity, co-dependency, rejection, loss, emotional trauma and marital difficulties.

Professional & Personal Development

  • Personal Breakthrough Session: Professional – Executive – Creative – Performance – Corporate – Life Coach (90 minutes)
  • Intensive NLP Life Coaching Personal Breakthrough Programme (2 hours)

These sessions help clients who feel at an impasse or have a huge decision to make in their lives – personally or professionally – and provides the structure for them to move forward and unlock unexpressed potential in a short space of time. You will gain determination and inspiration that comes from your own instinct and self-development. Any issue will be dealt with the utmost respect and sensitivity.


What is Kaizen? Kai-zen is a Japanese word and KAI means continuous self improvement, change for the better, to be in balance in daily life, to move forward. ZEN means living in the present, in the here and now; being exactly who you are, being real, not out of demand or expectation of others, but to develop one’s natural flow of communication and openness towards improving our lives and connection with others.

Often, in our professional or personal relationships, we can find it difficult to tolerate difference and live by other’s disapproval and subsequently become most unlike ourselves for fear that we won’t be accepted. The Kaizen way is about living as close to the truth as possible and being able to have close loving relationships, to accept “what is” without trying to change or force things to be other then they are. Living without self expectation and the harsh limitations that deny us from living a truly whole and fulfilling life.

The Kaizen approach can be affective in every area of life, both personal and professional as it focuses on bringing about transformational therapeutic change at a level of “Being” by accessing and utilizing your internal strengths, abilities and resources. With the Kaizen approach, you can move towards emotional freedom and liberate yourself from negative emotions and experience a renewed sense of vitality and creative inspiration.

Helen Mia Harris says, “I am passionate about my work as I know it makes a tangible difference to any sensitive situation, enabling you to feel good again; to experience the self recognition that your aspirations require, confirmation of what is possible in the here and now and the validation to make a life changing difference in all that you are.”

The Kaizen Approach removes the barriers and blocks that create procrastination and equips you to connect with where you want to be. You will experience the self recognition that your aspirations require, confirmation of what is possible in the “here and now” and the validation to make a life changing difference.

Helen’s Kaizen counselling and Emotional Well Being therapy is professional, empathetic, present and ethical. She is committed to providing you with a safe, supportive and truly rewarding experience that will revive your aspiration and inspiration to move towards a sense of emotional freedom and self fulfilment.


Your private and confidential sessions either take place in warm and pleasant surroundings or many may prefer having their consultation via a Zoom meeting. I work with sensitivity, care and attentiveness and after only one or two sessions with me, you will experience a tangible difference to any tender issue and see a way forward. Call me or email to book an appointment or with any questions you may have.

  • Relationship Counselling, Couples Therapy, Marriage Counselling and Couples Coaching £90 (1-hour) with a full Communication Programme I have written
  • This will assist you between sessions.
  • For Couples and Individuals.

These sessions can be helpful when experiencing difficulties in individuals, e.g. Heartbreak, abandonment, insecurity, love addiction, loss, separation, emotional trauma and marital difficulties. Or those at an impasse or who have to make a huge life-changing decision in their professional or personal life.